For Pets
Chief Officer of Squirrel Surveillance (For Pets)
Chief Officer of Squirrel Surveillance (For Pets)
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𦓠Chief Officer of Squirrel SurveillanceĀ
For the brave pup who has barked at every squirrel since 2018.
š Introducing the Chief Officer of Squirrel Surveillance Certificate, issued by the Canine Intelligence Bureau of Backyardan State. A tail-wagging tribute to the four-legged friend who guards the perimeter with wild devotion (and zero chill).
š¶ Why This Makes the Perfect Gift:
āļø Custom printed with your dogās name
āļø Hilarious wall art for dog parents and fur families
āļø Looks paws-itively epic above the treat jar
āļø Great for birthdays, adoptions, or just-because zoomie parties
š¬ Just a Taste of the Glory:
"If it climbs trees and mocks me from above, it shall be barked at."
ā Squirrel Surveillance Officer, every dog ever
ā Great For:
- Dog moms and dads
- Pet lovers and backyard warriors
- Funny gifts for dog owners
- Animal shelter thank-you gifts
- New dog adoptions and puppy showers
š Product Specs:
Size: 8" x 10"
Paper: Premium enhanced matte (scratch-resistant)
Thickness: 10.3 mil
Weight: 189 g/m²
Brightness: 104%
š All About the Experience:
- Custom pet name included
- Printed and shipped with tail-wagging care
- Guaranteed to bring smiles, snorts, and tail thumps
š¾ Disclaimer: Does not reduce barking frequency. May intensify squirrel obsession.
š§¾ This is a custom product, lovingly made just for you. All sales are final.
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Let customers speak for us
from 10 reviewsHonestly didnāt expect this level of print quality for a gag gift. The paper feels premium, colors pop, and it arrived super quick. Perfect gift for literally anyone with a sense of humor.
Honestly didnāt expect this level of print quality for a gag gift. The paper feels premium, colors pop, and it arrived super quick. Perfect gift for literally anyone with a sense of humor.
These certificates are the perfect mix of classy and funny. Got one for my dad, one for my coworker, and now Iām hooked. Shipping was fast, packaging was nice, great overall experience.
The seal, the font, the design, all look real. My friend thought it was a real award until he read the title. Gave us the biggest laugh of the night.
My friend has a pile of half-read books and half started projects. This certificate was made for him. Great print quality, looks like a real degree.
I gifted it to my friend who keeps saying āthis next coin will moon.ā He nearly cried laughing. Worth every satoshi.
The cats dont really care about the piece of paper, but as their humans we found it extremely funny and fitting. The two cats are great at making loud crashes and galloping thuds throughout the home at night
My mother-in-law absolutely LOVES her prank certificate! She even framed it and put it on display in the hallway. She's been helping with our laundry since our dryer broke and over time she's amassed quite a collection of single kids socks. She's always on the lookout for matches when she picks up the next load. This certificate was the perfect way to say thank you and share a laugh about all the missing socks
š¤ Frequently Asked (and Occasionally Silly) Questions
How fast will my certificate arrive?
Each masterpiece is printed fresh to order, no pre-printed pranks lying around here! šØļø
It usually takes 5ā7 days to create and ship your certificate straight from the USA. Totally worth the wait for something this āofficial.ā š
Is the stamp or seal actually embossed?
Not quite, but the print and paper quality are museum-level.
We use thick, premium paper and high-resolution printing that looks so real, people might actually believe you graduated. š
Do the certificates come framed?
No frame included, youāll receive the 8ā³Ć10ā³ printed certificate (a standard size thatās super easy to frame).
Pro tip: pop it into a gold frame and it instantly looks Ivy-League fancy. āØ
What if I want to return it?
Since every certificate is custom-printed just for you, we donāt accept returns.
That said, almost everyone loves their order, itās rare anyone isnāt cracking up! š
But if something doesnāt look right or youāre not happy for any reason, send us a message.